Caroline's Diary
by I AM NOT A MORON
Summary: An old, tattered book hiding in the dark, unknown depths of Black Mesa, with faded writing printed on the cover; Diary 1907. What story lives within those ripped pages, behind that damp, fraying spine? A/N; This story includes spoilers. Also, all spelling mistakes from the original diary have been corrected for the sake of the reader.
1. 1907

**Diary 19****07**

_To my dear daughter, Caroline. I made this book for you when you were born, and I think you are old enough to have it now. It's a book where you can write all your secrets in. I hope it comes in useful to you. Lots of love from mummy xxx_

**13th August 1907**

My name is Caroline Taylor. I am 9 years old and I have brown hair and brown eyes. My mummy is called Michelle and my daddy is called Scott. I don't have any brothers or sisters and it's quite lonely at home! I am in class 5 at my school. My best friend is called Greg but everyone laughs at me because he's a boy. I don't care though, we're best friends anyway so there.

**18th August 1907**

Mummy says I'm meant to write secrets in here but I don't really have any secrets. I'm going to do some science instead because I don't like writing. Science is my favourite subject at school. Mr. Johnson is my Science teacher, his boy is called Cave and he is in class 6. I think he's a bit scary because he shouts a lot.

**27th August 1907**

I'm doing some Science at home because Mr. Johnson doesn't let us make up our own experiments, he says it's too dangerous. So I'm going to do it at home instead.

SCIENCE EXPERIMENT 1 - WATER AND SALT AND SOAP

What I am going to use

Some water and some salt and some honey soap. Mummy said I couldn't use it because it costs lots of money but I'm going to use it anyway for Science.

What I am going to do

I'm going to mix it all up in one big bowl and put it in a freezer and then take it out in a few hours and see what happens. I think the waters going to freeze and the salt will probably dissolve like it did at school and the soap will probably make the water all soapy.

What happened

When I took it out of the fridge it was all frozen and really cold. It smelt a bit like honey but mummy wouldn't let me eat it. It's only a bit of ice with salt and soap so I did it anyway. It tasted really horrible though and I feel a bit poorly now. I hope it wasn't poison.

**28th August 1907**

I have to stay at home today and I'm not aloud out of my bed because I am a bit ill from the icy water stuff. Mummy says it's the salt that made me sick and I'll probably be okay to go to school tomorrow. I hope Gregs not wondering where I am.


	2. 1911

**4th February 1911**

Dear Diary,

I haven't written in here for four years now! I'm 13 years old anyway, and the reason I haven't written in this book for so long is because I lost it under my bed when I was sick. I only just found it now when I was looking for this part I lost for my new potato battery I got for my birthday. I know I'm a bit old for it but it still really fascinates me how electricity can actually be generated by a little vegetable like a potato. It just goes to show how cool Science is!

Anyway, I'm in high school now! It's really scary because there's loads of people older than me, but the lessons are cooler and guess what? There's a cafe in the school! I think that's really cool but I'm not aloud to buy anything, mum says it's too expensive. But, I know someone that I really fancy. It's Cave from primary school! But he is one year older than me and he's still quite scary because he shouts a lot still.

Greg's still around as well luckily and we're still best friends! But we don't have many lessons together which is really bad because we don't see each other that much anymore sadly. But we are still best friends!

**21st October 1911**

Dear Diary,

I haven't written in here in a while because I don't really like writing that much so I'm probably only going to write in here every so often. Anyway, soon there's a Halloween party at school! I'm really excited, me and Greg are going but people keep laughing at us because they think we are in love. I said we're not but they won't listen. Idiots.

Anyway I can't wait because all our school projects are being shown and I can show mum my work. There's also going to be a competition to see who's work is the best. I hope I win!

I wonder if there's going to be cake there. That would be nice. I really like cake.

**31st October 1911**

Dear Diary,

Argh I'm really scared! I'm hiding in the girl's toilets at the moment because Greg just said that he loved me! What am I supposed to say?!

Uh oh, someone else is coming in the loos I'm just going to run into this cubicle here... phew! Oh no, who is it? Ah I think it's Greg!

Yes it is! Okay, I'm just going to be really quiet and hope he doesn't come back. Yes that will be fine. He shouldn't be in the girl's toilet's anyway!

Oh no someone's telling him off! Well at least he's out of the toilets. I'm going to get out of here because it sort of smells.

**1st November 1911**

Dear Diary,

Well yesterday was a nightmare! After I got out the toilets Greg found me and got annoyed with me because I ran away! He walked off with his other friends and I was left by myself for the rest of the party. I did cry a bit because he's my best friend and he said we've fallen out. There wasn't even any cake. I haven't seen him anywhere at school today either, not even in Science.

**2nd November 1911**

Dear Diary,

Today I saw Greg! But he ran away before I could even say hello! I don't really know why he isn't talking to me but it's really bad. I do have some other friends but no-one's like Greg.

**7th November 1911**

Dear Diary,

Greg is talking to me again! I'm so happy! He hasn't said anything about the party though. Anyway, I've got loads of Science homework to do so I'll get back to that!


	3. 1912

**12th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

It's been a while since I last wrote in my diary. Well, I didn't write in it this time because frankly, there isn't anything to write about. Life is so boring right now. I just go to school every day, do the same old lessons. Maths, english, Science, french and so on. It's so boring. Well, Science is okay, but I've said that a million times now. It's probably the only valuable lesson I learn at school.

Well anyway. I am finally reaching my last school year which is a relief. I never really knew anyone at school except Greg. So it's quite lucky that he's in nearly all the same lessons as me. It's not that I'm shy. It's just no-one else seems intellegent enough to bother with. They don't understand the art of sarcasm, and they don't get any of my jokes. I know it sounds snobbish, but it's the truth I'm afraid.

I decided to write in here today because guess what? Okay, I can't hide my excitement any more because... I met Cave, who I fancied since... last year! We talked so much today at lunch break. And guess what we talked about? SCIENCE! Yes! S-C-I-E-N-C-E. He likes it too. So me and Greg and Cave were all having this massive conversation about Science and how amazing it was. Greg doesn't know that I fancy Cave, I've never told him about it because I don't think he'd really appreciate that kind of information. But I think he saw that I was a little bit too keen when we were talking. I hope he just thought it was for Science.

So, that's basically what's been happening lately. Me meeting Cave... And we even said we should talk again! So I'm really excited about that. Although he is still a little scary he is a very inspirational man.

**18th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

Well here we are again. I didn't think that I would be writing in here so soon but I talked to Cave again today! I think Greg got a bit bored though because he kind of started to wander off with his other friends. He is still keen on Science I think, but probably not as keen as me and Cave.

Anyway, Cave says when he's older he really wants to start some company that makes products from Science. He doesn't really know what products he's actually going to make yet though. He seems really ambitious though, as well as extremely handsome...

I'm really looking forward to talking to him again. The conversations I have with him are the most lively conversations I have had in a while. It's like we're meant to be toge- Well, we're only friends.

**19th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

Had a near death experience today! I was walking back from school when a car nearly hit me! Do you know when you fall down the stairs? Well, you wouldn't know, you're a book. Anyway. It was ten times as scary as that! Adrenaline was rushing through me at ninety miles per hour it seemed. Luckily the car stopped just before it hit me. Phew! I'm so lucky to be alive. If I'd walked onto the road just a few meters down I wouldn't be here now.

**20th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

Needless to say I talked to Cave yet again today! Although we have spent hours talking at lunch, we never seem to run out of things to say. That amazes me. I do really fancy him more than ever, but, well, we're just friends. For the moment.

Greg hung around with us at first break. He seems quite inspired by Cave as well. But then in english I was talking to him about how amazing Cave was. I think I might have been talking about him a bit too much because I haven't seen him since. He probably got bored of all the Science talk but... Well, I hope he's okay.

**27th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

Oh my god. I have so much to write about.

The last seven days have been very interesting for school; An entire week of talking to Cave about our ambitions for Science. I think I'm becoming quite obsessed with the subject, and by extention, him. But now... Well...

Today Greg came up to me. He asked me if I liked Cave. Outright. Like that. If I didn't tell him, why did he feel the need to ask? Well, I just blushed and stood there silently. Then he got all angry and started saying how I've been ignoring him for the last week and how rejected he's felt. Well, how come he feels rejected? He's the one who didn't take part in the conversations, he's the one who went off with his other friends! Well, I just stood there and glared at him angrily. I never told him I fancy Cave, and that was for a reason. Not to hurt his feelings.

And then he said one of the most rediculous things I've ever heard him say. He told me that he believed in "parrallel universes" or whatever they're called, and in one of these "parrallel universes" I could have died from that car nearly hitting me a few days ago. He said that in that "parrallell universe" Cave wouldn't care about me dying, and neither would he.

However ridiculous that theory sounds, it still really upset me. After he said that, I just wanted to hurt him as much as I could. So I did.

I made to go towards him and start punching him as hard as I could when he pulled me into a hug and started to... kiss me? I really didn't know how to react so I kind of just hung there in his arms and didn't do anything.

Then he just pulled me away and looked right into my eyes. It was so strange, I never thought that this would happen. He told me he loved me. And I just stood there like a potato, still not really knowing what to do.

And then Cave came into the room and started asking what all the shouting was about but then he saw us and just raised one eyebrow and kind of laughed nervously. He then mentioned vaguely something about shower curtains and left the room again.

Then I kind of just snapped. I don't really know why, I just took Greg's face in my hands and bent his neck. That took a nasty turn. So did his neck.

Well, I haven't seen him in a while. I just know he went to hospital after my, well... episode. I hope he's okay. And I guess I do miss him.

**28th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

Well, I'm still kind of getting over the events of yesterday. Apparently, Cave found out what I did to Greg. He seems to have some kind of new respect for me now. He pays me a little more attention than he did, but it's not like he's scared of me. It's almost as if he's in awe of me. I don't think he knows the full story though.

And guess what? He invited me to this Science meeting he goes to! Okay, I know I really shouldn't sound this excited about going with Cave, after what happened yesterday, but it's all for Science, right?

So Cave told me we're going to meet at his house on Thursday after school and then he'll take me to this meeting he goes to every other week! We came up with this idea of water-reppelant material we wanted to talk about so Cave said this meeting is the place to go. He says I can be his assistant! I can't wait.

**30th May 1912**

Dear Diary,

We went to the meeting. It was very interesting, but most of the other people were older than us and didn't seem to understand how serious we were about Science because of our age. They kept laughing at our water repellant material, but one day we will show them. Cave told me he came up with the idea of making shower curtains from the material. I think that's a great idea. Anyway, I want to write all about his house because it's so cool!

Well, it is a bit small but you know. His family is really nice, but it is a bit wierd seeing your ex-science teacher in that light. Cave lives with his mum, dad, and younger cousin, Doug, who seems to be really scared of me. He hid behind Mr. Johnson when I came in which I thought was a bit strange because he is only a few years younger than me. I asked Cave why his cousin lives with him but he was quite vague about it.

Anyway, at the meeting there was lots of talk about different technologies. They were talking about designing this new technology called nanoparticles. They are basically really really really small particles of materials that have different properties to their origianal materials because of their surface area. Wow, if they got to make them imagine what you could do with them!

They were also talking about using DNA to clone humans! That would be so cool, but I suppose there would be loads of political issues on that.

Well anyway. I'm so tired, I think I'm going to go to sleep now.

**31st May 1912**

Dear Diary,

I'm starting to get a bit worried about Greg now, it's been a week and I still haven't heard from him. I didn't actually break his neck. I just seriously injured him. Well, one can only hope.

Seriously though, I am getting quite worried. Surely he should be back by now? I feel terrible for forgetting him like that. And beating him up.

And possibly breaking his neck.

But it is quite worrying. To be fair, I did call someone for help as soon as he fell to the floor in pain. It's not like I just abandoned him. Still, I feel like a monster.

Anyway, I talked to Cave again today. He asked me what exactly happened. I just kind of said, it was complicated and that was that. For once, Cave did just accept it without a Scientific explanation, which was quite a relief.

I asked him about Doug living with him and he told me something awful! Doug had been abused by his parents, and when Cave's parents found out the police got involved, and Doug was taken away from his mum and dad. Luckily Cave's parents were aloud to adopt him and he was very close to . But this whole court case had apparently happened only a few months ago so Doug was still into his nervous habits.

Well, I think that's enough for one day, anyway. I'm quite surprised that Mr. Johnson's sister and her husband were so voilent. But I suppose that doesn't mean the whole family is like that.


	4. 1915

**23rd November 1915**

Dear Diary,

It's been a long time. And I still haven't heard from Greg, thinking about it. Since I graduated from grammar school, I have been studying Science inside out at University. It's so fascinating. But I do miss Cave.

Yes, I don't see him anymore, I'm afraid to say, diary. He went to California University of Science. It's a huge place. I'm quite dissapointed that I couldn't afford to enter myself. Still, every so often we write to each other.

Apart from that, not much has happened. I've turned 17 years old since then, but that should be obvious, looking at the date. You'd be a moron not to notice that.

So, I just wanted to write in here about what I'm doing in University, which is Science, and cooking. I thought about cooking because it is a form of Science, isn't it? And it involves cake. I do like cake.

Anyway, I'm going through a dilemma at the moment. Although I've dedicated my entire life towards Science, what will I do with it afterwards? Yes, I used to have foolish teenage dreams about working with Cave in a huge factory, but let's face the truth. I was 15 years old, more or less. And I only write to Cave every so often. To be honest, I doubt it will ever happen.

So I came up with a solution, however humble it may sound. Perhaps, when I've graduated from University, I could run my own baking business. I could bake cakes, sell them, and get money. And I'd still be using Science.

But it doesn't feel right, it doesn't feel like proper Science. Real Science is all about testing, experimenting, and baking cakes isn't tests. I'll have to think of something else, because cake won't be enough. And it makes you fat.

**25th December 1915**

Dear Diary,

I have returned to my parents house for Christmas this year, and it occoured to me how little I see them. My poor family are getting old now, and it does worry me how many grey hairs Mum has got.

Well, I know they've got a long time yet, so I suppose there's no real need to worry. Anyway. I've had a great day today, I baked the Christmas meal with Mum and we had a really nice time.

I also got a letter from Cave. I'm glad it arrived on time. He tells me he's graduating from his University next year, and he's going to set up his new Shower Curtain Business.

And most surprisingly, I saw Greg. Yes, Greg-Greg, Greg W. from grammar school! He didn't stay, put it that way. It turns out he's been running short on money, and was looking for a house like my parent's house to buy. It's obvious he lacks education since leaving grammar school early.

As you can imagine, there was quite a bit of drama when he spotted me. He stared at me for a moment, and then turned to leave. I called him back, thinking perhaps we could make up. Well, you can imagine that moron's reaction to that. He started spitting spiteful words in my direction about how we'd never be friends again, and how he'd never forgive me. I turned and yelled at him to get out of my house.

Merry Christmas.


	5. 1916

**4th January 1916**

Dear Diary,

I cannot believe that _moron!_ After his idiotic shouting match on Christmas Day, after ruining the evening after I just said hello, Greg goes and writes me a letter. Why he thinks I would even bother to read a stupid letter in his childlike handwriting after what he said yesterday, I have no idea.

Why I read it, I also have no idea.

_My address, so you can send me your reply:_

_Greg Wheatley,_

_98 Lost End,_

_Cude Crossing Windmill,_

_California_

_Dear Caroline!_

_Okay, I- well as you can see I've written this out all neat so you can enjoy it's... it's neatness, and just so it looks good, actually. Nice, good-looking letter, always a good first- well in your case, 100th - impression. Anyway, I'm just going to get straight to the point here. So, I just wanted to say – well write's probably the best word isn't it, because I'm writing this down now, see, haha._

_Anyway I just wanted to say – I mean write- that I'm sorry. Because, of, of what I said yesterday probably wasn't fair – to you – it was to me, but it obviously wasn't to you, okay, I've messed this up but it's my fifth try - okay I'll be honest, five hundredth - and it _is _a bit of a waste of paper, isn't it really, that. And a lot of money, by extention, on _my_ part, so there you go. Paper prices _have_ gone up, over the years, haven't they? I think._

_So you've probably forgiven me haven't you? Just in case you haven't, I bought you some flowers! Because you – well, not you as a person, just girls in general – seem to like flowers. The only problem is, it costs quite a lot of money to post them, and they don't actually fit into the post box. So I can't actually send them to you, just an interesting, and hopefully, good fact for you there. That I bought you some flowers. Well, actually picked them from my neighbours garden- no shouldn't write that, that won't make her forgive me._

_Well, anyway! I was just thinking, now you've forgiven me -assuming that you have- that we should see each other again. Maybe I could take you out for a drink one day, and then I could get you drunk, and make you tell me- I mean, um, maybe we could... just see each other! A classic, good old, friendly visit. And I can give you the flowers I bought. While we're on the subject, by the way, I did _not_ steal them, or pick them from someone elses garden. Just, went to a gas station – no, no, a proper flourists – and bought them. Just like that. So, there you go. You've got your brand new flowers, although they might not be by the time I give them to you – well, you know what I mean, nice gestures and all._

_So, I think that's just about it! I've said sorry, you've forgiven me, hopefully, I mean it's not like I broke your neck or anything, haha. Actually, that's not really funny, is it, now you think about it. Especially as you almost did that to _me!_- Okay, okay, don't want to write that down, definately don't want to write that one down, there. Well – the point is, I'm sorry, and I'm still truly, honestly... um... sorry._

_And completely and utterly still in love with you._

_There you go, you've gone and made me say it now haven't you? Had to hear me say it, didn't you? Had to squeeze every last bit of information you could out of poor old Greg here, didn't you? No, too late, the damage is done, it's over now._

_No no _no_, not litterally! Just – just talking – I mean writing, to myself, it's not over, not at all, we can still go out for that drink! So, don't worry! Don't panic over it, stop panicking, it's all fine._

_Right. Anyway. I have to go now, because I'm getting a bit tired of- I mean, I have to go and, um, go and see my neighbours, and apologise for stealing- I mean, apologise for... what? Apologise for, for nothing, actually. I just have to go over there and give them some... something I made, just a bit of... um... cake, for them, as a little thank you gift. A thank you gift for what, you might be asking? Well, for being there, for existing, for a start, and just, generally, being my neighbours. It's our neighbour anniversary today. 50th. I mean, for them, it's their 50th birthday, joint birthday, see- and well, I'm just giving them... some birthday cake! And a present. So that's why I'm going, so not because I'm bored of writing to you, so I'll see you later, Bye!_

_From Greg_

_P.S. Oh, by the way, just thought I'd let you know, I'm moving to the UK, for a bit, well, forever, actually, so you won't have long until I'm gone! So, get your skates on, as they say, or you might miss your chance with me! You never know, if your quick enough, we could move up there together, who's to say at this stage! But, I would probably hurry up if I were you, because I am quite the looker, it's not every day you get one like me, I'll be honest. Not to boast, it's not something I do, but it is the truth. So, just come on over!_

To Greg,

I don't even know what to write. Did you honestly expect me to forgive you, just because you stole some flowers from your neighbours garden and scribbled a bit on some paper?

No, I'm afraid it will take more than that, much more. Do you know how worried I used to be about you? And then you just come back and yell at me like nothing happened. I used to cry about you, wondering if you were dead or not.

Now? I don't even care.

You used to be so different to what you're like now. You used to be kind, you didn't yell at me, and you were clever and dedicated. What happened to you? You've become some kind of blubbering wreck of idiocy. And you're the _dumbest_ _moron_ I've ever known, let alone ugly.

I'm done here.

-Caroline

**6th January 1916**

Dear Diary,

After sleeping a few nights on whether I should send that letter, I've decided not to. That idiot can wait forever, as far as I'm concerned. I don't care any more. I don't even know why I bothered to read his stupid letter in the first place.

Anyway. I had quite a good new year, despite the interruption of that moron. Again I spent it with my parents while I'm away from University. I am missing University, though. Well, I'll be on my way back tomorrow anyway. I'm looking forward to it.


	6. 1917

**13th June 1917**

Dear Diary,

Not much has happened, as always. Still studying Science at university, but next year I am going to be leaving after my course is complete. I am still toying with the uncomfortable decision of my future, and I am seriously beginning to wonder if I should actually go ahead and write to old Cave, and ask him if he has a place for me at this shower curtain business he wrote to me about. Ha ha.

Seriously, though, speaking of Cave, I got a letter from him the other day. He was telling me how he's just graduated from university, but an imbecile got the timetable wrong and the course took longer than it was meant to. Speaking of morons, Greg hasn't written to me in a long time. Which I'm pretty pleased about, actually. Still, he only knows where my poor parents live, so he might be bombarding them with ridiculous letters about going out for a drink. That reminds me; I really should write to them, and tell them to burn any ridiculous letters they get about going out for a drink.

Anyway. I have to go, I've got a free break and I want to spend it wisely, _not_ worrying about a particularly painful-to-read letter that a particularly painful-to-listen-to idiot wrote.

_Caroline,_

_Just graduated from university. I know it's late, because some idiot messed everything up, realised the courses were meant to finish a couple of months later than everyone thought. He needs to be fired._

_I'm starting up my shower curtain business now. Let's show that bunch of eggheads that laughed at our idea who's laughing now. Not them._

_One last thing – write back._

_-Cave_

**19th November 1917**

I just got a letter from Cave today! He tells me his business is finally running!

And... guess what? He has asked me to be his assisstant! I am so so excited, I sound like a little girl, but I know it's only shower curtains, but he wants me to be his assistant! In Science! I've been worrying about this for ages now, I finally know what I want to do, oh I don't even know what to say, or write to him, what am I going to say! I'm going to be spending every day all day with him, I really really can't wait!

He told me to just go to this adress he sent me and I'll find his business with all his employees, and everything and he told me to go as soon as I got the letter, so what am I doing here? Oh my gosh I'm going to see Cave I'm going to be his partner in Science!

**20th November 1917**

Dear Diary,

Yes I have composed myself a little more today. The job is great! I'm so happy. The only problem is, I'm still studying in university so I only have limited time. That means I'll be opting out of my Science and cooking course. But it's for Science itself, so it doesn't matter. Cave tells me he doesn't need anyone with proper qualifications, just anyone who can come up with a hypothesis, a method, results and an evaluation is good enough for "Aperture Science".

"Aperture Science" is the name of his company. I don't completely understand why it's called "Aperture", but I suppose it sounds catchy. I'm guessing the "Science" at the end means we'll be doing more Science than just shower curtains here. I'm very excited to get started.

**5th December 1917**

Dear Diary,

Oh, you wouldn't believe what has happened today at Aperture. You wouldn't believe it. I can't. I don't even know how to feel at the moment, but I'm pretty sure I should be feeling angry about this one.

Guess who's decided they want to be employed for brand new, just-started, Aperture Science? Guess who's completely ignoring me, and not even looking at me, even though I'm one of their colleages, and I'm the founder's assisstant? Guess who's sucking up to _my _boss? Just _guess_.

It's _Greg_. I cannot believe that repulsive, persistent, obnoxious little _moron_. I thought we had nothing to do with each other any more. Well, I haven't said a word to him – and he hasn't said a word to me, luckily, because we all know that for him, one word is about 100 to everyone else, and I'd probably die of boredom even if I_ tried _to listen.

I'm going to stay as far from that little piece of scum as I can. I really hate him. I do not trust myself to even look at him, which is useful, because I don't particularly _want_ to look at him. The only word I can think of that will describe him is -

Wow. I can't even think of a bad enough word to describe him. That's _impressive._

Well, I have to go now, before I get myself angry over it again, and end up doing something stupid. I don't really want to question Cave about it, because it's his company, but I do really want to know why he doesn't fire that idiot before he can even try to ruin something by just being within a ten mile radius of it.


	7. 1920

**13th July 1920**

Dear Diary,

I haven't written in here for such a long time, because I've been so busy. The speed at which Mr Johnson is reeling in employees with a false impression is alarmingly fast, and I have to register them all. But I don't mind. I don't really care whether the employees know what they are doing here, but the important thing is that they're getting here and working. Still, I would be more grateful if Mr Johnson could try and find the scientists with proper qualifications as it is becoming quite painful to avoid the ever-watchful eye of the government.

Speaking of qualifications, I have recieved the correct qualifications to become an assistant. I know Mr Johnson didn't want me to do it but I think it is a more respectful, not to mention professional envoironment. After all, it's all about Science.

Just as I expected, the moron has become one of the lowest rank employees. His job is to sit there and type up the easiest memos in the world, but he doesn't even do that. I'm being serious, all he does is sit there doing nothing, and attempt at the most dumb and awkward conversations with anyone he sees.

Anyway, why am I even talking about that imbecile? There's Science to be done. While we're on the subject of Science, Mr Johnson and I have been discussing whether it is time we branched out into other products. He thinks it's a good idea, but I am still recieving letters of complaint about the shower curtains. People are very ungrateful these days, complaining about one small, slightly deadly side-effect of the nanoparticles used in the shower curtain material.

Also, Mr Johnson's cousin Doug is coming to work here soon, after he has recieved the qualifications. He says that Doug shares our love for Science and he expects him to be one of the best workers here. I haven't seen him since he was a little boy. He was so frightened of me then.

Anyway, I think that's just about all I have to say at the moment. There is a lot of work to do at Aperture, and I can't wait to start.

**12th September 1920**

Dear Diary,

Mr Johnson has decided to branch out on new products for Science! He has invented – with my assisstance – a new kind of gel called repulsion gel. It is used for diets. When consumed it coats the lining of the stomach, and the properties of the gel will cause the food to bounce out of the stomach and through the mouth.

There are a few problems I think that he is overlooking, however. One of it's side effects are constant vomiting, and a bit of starvation. The gel seems quite difficult to remove from the lining of the stomach as well, which is a small problem. Also, the consumers using this gel have died of something afterwards. Mr Johnson keeps telling me, or himself, that it is a coincidence, but I'm not completely sure.

Mr Johnson has told me that we are going to need more test subjects and employees, because he is planning on selling the new product as soon as possible. Our company is a little short on money, as well. He tells me that if we can sell a few more products – and avoid being continually sued for the deaths that are still occouring because of the shower curtains – we might be able to buy an old salt mine below Golden Plains to build a new, and more secret, Science Research Centre.

Well, I don't know at the moment, it will take a long time to get that amount of money. Unless we can somehow scam employees into not being payed, but I think that's one step too far, even for Mr Johnson.

**30th November 1920**

Dear Diary,

I am in awe of Mr Johnson. He has not only been scamming employees into not being payed, but he managed to trick them into _paying us_! I don't even know how he did that. All I know now, though, is that we are rich.

And guess where we're moving to?

Golden Plains Salt Mine.

I'm very happy for Mr Johnson, although I am a little weary at how immoral his decisions are. If I didn't know any better I could have sworn he was a psychopath. But he is a good man, of course he is. He is very kind deep down.

Why else would I be working for him?

Anyway, he has bought the mine and builders are working on it at the moment, constructing the offices the testing spheres we are going to be using for testing our new products. I am a little concerned about the amount of money we have left, however, because Mr Johnson has filled up nine shafts with these testing spheres and we only really need one at the moment.

Still, I know that in the near future we will know what we are going to use them for. Who knows, we might even need more yet.


	8. 1923

**12****th**** April 1923**

Dear Diary,

I am beginning to feel a little uncomfortable around Mr. Johnson. I am not sure why but I think I have feelings for him. This is terrible, I am his personal assistant- but when I'm alone, like now, I can't get him off my mind. What am I meant to do? I feel awful. We are meant to have a professional relationship only, but I can't go on like this.

But then again, I am not sure if it's entirely my fault, to be fair. He has been saying things that might suggest other things to me. I think it's wrong though, probably because of my education, but it doesn't feel right at all!

And yet, somehow, it feels so natural at the same time.

No, I must stop talking like this. I must get over it. Anyway, I've got Science to do. We have been working on the most amazing projects at the moment. For a start, Dr. H Webber is in charge of the artifical intellegence section (which, to be honest, is going nowhere), Dr. C Smith is working on the portal project (which is going somewhere but very very slowly), and Mr. Johnson is starting up an Enrichment project, which will involve test subjects being tested with our new products.

Okay, this isn't working. I can't avoid writing it anymore. I know exactly what's wrong with me, but I cannot face it.

Mum has fallen fatally ill. And I can't even be there for her. That's all I can bear to say.

**19****th**** April 1923**

Dear Diary,

This week has dragged by like a year. I don't know how much longer I can stay here. But I've got to keep going, I've got to stay calm, I've got to do it for Science.

Dad really wants me to travel to hospital to visit Mum in hospital. But I'm not sure if I can bear to see her. I think I am going to have to avoid it.

The other day I forgot to write about Cave's cousin, Doug. He's beginning to work here. He's really quiet. On his first day he seemed to have some kind of nervous break down. Really though, I don't blame him. This place is so stressful.

Look at me. I'm pathetic. I need to stop writing in here and go back to Science. This won't be enough.

**23****rd**** April 1923**

Mum died last night. It was very unexpected. Everyone thought she had longer than that.

**24****th**** April 1923**

It's beginning to get to me now. I can't believe it happened. Dad is really upset and I feel so sorry that I never saw her. I was never there for her, or for Dad.

I'm going down there tomorrow to visit him. It's a long way so I'll have to wait until tomorrow. Mr. Johnson must understand that it's urgent. I'm not sure I can spend that much longer with him.

**12**

**th**** May 1923**

Dear Diary,

I have returned to work as I must as soon as I can. Me and Dad sorted out the funeral. Everyone was really nice to us, and there were so many flowers there.

Anyway, in the light of what's happened, Mr. Johnson was very kind and let me bring Dad back to work with me after the funeral. I am never going to properly get over what happened. I still don't understand how it happened so quickly.

I've really got to get my priorities back, though. Mr. Johnson got me into smoking. I need to stop, but it's just so hard to get over it.

**27****th**** May 1923**

Dear Diary,

This is getting extremely inappropriate. Mr. Johnson is not supposed to know me outside of work, and yet he has invited me to a party for the 1st June. It is a celebration for the progress that Aperture has made during the six years we have been around.

Well, I suppose that it is work related. And all our colleages will be there. I'm probably just being a bit paranoid. Dad is going to be there, anyway.

I wonder if there will be cake this time.

**2****nd**** June 1923**

I have the most painful hangover in all my life. I barely drink. Apart from last night, of course.

Oh god.

I cannot completely remember what happened, but I just woke up a few seconds ago and Mr. Johnson is in a bed that I woke up in, which I'm fairly certain is never a good sign.

I am not even sure where the hell I am, thinking about it.

The memories are beginning to come back, now I look around the room. Oh dear god, what happened!

Oh no, this is terrible. There are all kinds of things on the floor including a collection of beer cans, vomit, a pile of clothes, and _what the hell is that?_

Mr. Johnson looks like a cold corpse lying in that bed. I wonder if he was too drunk to remember what happened last night? Maybe I will just get away with it. If I throw on these clothes- no, no! I am not going to wear them, I don't know what has happened to them, _where the hell have they been?_

Okay. I need to calm down. I'm sure there's a drawer here with clean clothes in it. I'll just put them on and get out of here. Hopefully Mr. Johnson will have no idea what has happened.

Why do all the parties I go to end up in a disaster with me panicking?

And no cake?

Uh oh. I can hear some footsteps outside the door. I've got to go. Oh god.


End file.
